Frank Ragnow Played Sunday With a Fractured Throat, But it Should've Been the Defense
I'm sorry, I never want to wish an injury upon anyone, I know these guys are all humans and have families and these are just their jobs at the end of the day, but really? Frank Ragnow has to be the guy with the fractured throat?? Why do bad things happen to good people. One of this teams FEW pro bowl candidates and this dude had to play the Green Bay Packers with auto erotic asphyxiation - commonly known as a fractured throat - for Christ sakes. And not only that, but after the eroticism set in (really devastating part of the injury) he chose to stay in the game!! That's a fucking football guy right there, that's a guy you can win with, that's a guy that belongs in a blue collar city like Detroit.
And now all I can think about is 1) I hope Frank gets better and 2) it should've been the defense. It should've been a collective, 11 man fractured throat. Why do the only guys that even remotely contribute to this team have to be the ones that get hurt? These guys like Stafford and Ragnow have to be looking around like, "I'm playing with my ribs sawed in half, I feel like I got choked out by the Hulk but we are still gonna suck it up and bust our asses for this good for nothing team? We're gonna bust our ass to score 24 just so the defense can give up 31??". Fucking A man, they're doing it without any help and as a reward they're breaking throats. So how about we ration out the injury amongst the group of guys that actually deserve a punishment. Maybe the defensive line gets sore throats, the linebacking core gets super congested and starts hawking up lugies or loogies however the fuck that's spelled, and maybe the secondary has to deal with an insatiable tickle in the back of their throat. Nobody getting hurt severely but I wish we could've taken Frank's surgery inducing fractured throat and go full communism with the affliction and spread it out amongst the 11 guys that are responsible for guys like Aaron Rodgers tea bagging the Lions every week. First it's Stafford with the fucked up ribs and now Frank with the slit throat?? Come on man, cut us one damn break. I swear to god if TJ Hockenson gets a hernia or some dumb shit next week I'm never watching football again. WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE.