The Detroit Tigers Will Make me Rich Beyond my Wildest Dreams
I may or may not have announced this publicly yet, via twitter or podcast, because I made the decision this weekend and my mind was consumed by mind altering agents, suffice to say, my memory isn't crystal clear on if I declared it or not.
That being said, as of Friday afternoon, opening day against the Reds, I have thrown the equivalent to an employed persons "mortgage" on the Detroit Tigers to win the AL Central this year. Now, 3 games in, people may be reading this thinking, this guy is a god damn genius, it would be my honor to follow him through the gates of hell both financially, spiritually, and physically. If that is you, then you are absolutely correct in that thought process, I didn't say it, you did. But for one second I do wanna talk Tigs.
Being up north this weekend I had inverse reception, or cable, and didn't watch a second of any of the games. However, I did watch the highlights and I gotta say, are the Tigers actually gonna win some games this year?? I made that bet fully expecting my bookie to have my money by the end of July but here we are sitting at the top of the divison! Sure it may only be 3 games in, but I look at it as 5% of the season, pretty fucking meaningful if you ask me. Back to the Tigs, the biggest reason I actually have an ounce of faith, maybe not in a pennant, but potentially sneaking into the playoffs is both of those wins were gutsy as fuck.
We let ourselves get dominated by both starting pitchers and struck out a bunch of times not only to tire out their starters faster, but to over inflate the confidence of both the fielders and the bullpen, classic mind game that paid off in spades. Both games i think we were either tied or down when the starters left the game and we rallied late due to some crucial hitting (I cant believe I just said that about the 2020 Tigers) and some solid work out of the bullpen, shout out Gregory Soto how the fuck have i never heard of him before? Just a lefty that throws 98 out of the pen? Seems like someone I should know about. I digress, both games were nutsack dragging in the gravel victories and something we would NEVER see from the group last year. And for that reason I have the slightest amount of hope.
For all the haters out there that think im an idiot or that the tigers are gonna go 2-58 I say this: you are the idiot my good sir/lady. The law of averages doesn't exist in 60 games, therefore anything is possible, therefore why not us, therefore Mize and hopefully Tork will be bolstering the ranks before long, therefore we believe, therefore Tigers will be a Darkhorse team, therefore 2020 AL Central Champs, therefore I am rich, therefore I need someone to help me pick out all 75 pairs of Jordan 1s ill be scooping once the check clears.
P.S. I fully expect us to be 2-2 and look like a shell of the once proud team we saw sunday but 10:30 pm tonight, hope im wrong though, go Tigers.